Wow.....Where do I begin? I can't tell this man enough how much I love him. I just want to tell him all the time. We had a lot of fun yesterday talking. He is the only man to really bring me tears -- tears of joy. We talked on & off yesterday via email and before he left, I told him I wanted to share with him an entry in my online diary. Here is what I wrote to him....

I have something I want to share with you, so let me know before you leave.....

Well I'm leaving here shortly.......What's up?

Now I don't normally share entries in my online diary with anyone...but I just have a feeling .... a need .... to share one in particular with you.....

Please do.

Here it is.......Please let me know what your thoughts are after reading it.....

The Only One Who Knows

I got your back, you got mine,
I'll help you out anytime.
If your broken heart needs to mend,
I'll be right there, to the end.
To see you hurt, to see you cry,
Makes me weep and wanna die.
Don't you ever doubt this love of mine,
It's yours to have until the end of time.
You have my heart, you have my soul, our love forever grows,
You are my first, you are my last, your the only one who knows.

I remember getting this poem a few months ago. It was October 29, 2003 and it was totally unexpected. It was very welcomed, but unexpected. We've had our ups and we've had our downs. He has made me a better person and I have made him a better person. Words can't express how deep my love is for him and how we were so meant to be together. I cannot love anyone else because I love him. There's no other way to put it. He makes me feel so needed, so wanted and so loved. I don't know what I would have done if God had not allowed him into my life. I thank God every day for bringing him into my life. All the good times, all the not-so-good times, I wouldn't trade any of it. It's helped make me who I am today. I'm a much stronger person because of him. We are both survivors and will continue to be. That's our strongest thread. WE ARE SURVIVORS! I have a new sense of faith because of him. I have a new sense of what it means to throw a golf club because of him. The word "Glitter" will never be the same because of him. I will forever know what it means to be loved and to have loved because of him. That is something I will always treasure for all of eternity.

Wow-

How do I respond to that?

The last two line of that poem mean the most to me. They actually took the longest to write. I knew what I wanted to say and how I wanted to end the poem, but I couldn't find a way to give what we had justice on paper. I hope that someday I can declare to the whole world and not just to you, that you indeed have my heart, and my soul.

You have and always will "Complete Me". You make my heart whole. You fill a void in my heart that I have never ever been able to fill before. I hope you understand what you truly mean to me.

I think I need to make a small addition to that last line of that poem...............

"You are my first, you are my last, your the only one who knows.......and loves....."The REAL Me"

I do love you. Every part of you. The "REAL" you. You already know how much you mean to me. There is no way we can give what we have justice on paper...it's next to impossible. I know that someday you can declare to the whole world and not just to me, that I indeed have your heart, and your soul. I have faith that, that day will come.

You make not only my heart complete, but you complete my SOUL, the very part of me that I have never opened up for anyone. I love you, every last inch of you. I love you for YOU. Everything you are I love. I love you for your strengths, I love you for your weaknesses. There is one last thing I want you to read & think about before you go......

It is so.....so...... "US"

A happy union is not one of perfect partners, but the triumph of love over imperfections.

I truly do know what I mean to you, and I know you know what you mean to me. I will forever love you.

Natalie-
I for the first time in my life am having a hard time telling someone that I love them. But I think you know that I always have and alwasy will. I have no idea what the future has in store for either one of us, but I know that I want you a part of my future. I think there are a million songs that could describe our love for each other. But I think this one sums it up pretty good for us both. It's by Babeface and it's called:

"When can I see you again?"

When can my heart beat again
When does the pain ever end
When do the tears stop from running over
When does you'll get over it begin

I hear what you're sayin'
But I swear that it's not making sense
So when can I see you

When can I see you again
When can my heart beat again
When can I see you again
And when can I breathe once again
And when can I see you again

When does my someday begin
When I'll find someone again
And what if I still am not truly over
What am I supposed to do then

Please hear what I'm sayin'
Even if, if it's not making sense
So when can I see you

This song means so much to me. It really speaks from my heart about how I've tired to get over you and the fact that I can't. I hope you can get the true meaning of this song!

"You can't stop what God intended, instead you can only delay the joy that he really has in store for you".

I couldn't say anything or respond to that bcuz I was in tears. I have loved this man since October. There's no way I can get over him. Nor do I want to. I would love to have in him my life forever. Anyway....back to our show! :)

Say something please........

I can't......

Then I will..........

I'm crying too hard....

Do the words, "I Love You" help at all?

Of course....

Well Sweetie-

I'm heading out, Stand up and let me tell you with my eyes what I just told you on paper.

Have a great night and think about me. I'll be thinking of you.

Your only......

I think about you all the time....every day of my life....

I Love you

Wow...I still get teary eyed just reading it. He makes me crazy in love! I love feeling this way! :) Well, that's all for now. ¶ 8:46:00 AM