Well, I guess it's safe to say that the relationship between Nate & I is officially done. I haven't heard from him since Wednesday. I refuse to go to him & I want him to email me if he wants something and, well, it's been 5 days. So, I guess it's done. I guess it's a good thing. Not really....I miss him terribly. But I have to move on. As much as I don't want to, I have to. I'm very sad too. I wish things never would have happened the way they did. Although, I do have to admit, I haven't thought about him as much as I thought I would. That is a very major plus. I told the General everything that happened, and he agrees that it is time for me to move on. He knows how much I love Nate and that I will always love Nate. But he agrees that things aren't like they used to be and they probably won't ever be again. And I am not going to be a "hobby" anymore. I feel like the only time spent together is when HE wants to and not for any other reason. So I'm out. I just feel so sad. This hurts. A LOT!! I will never love anyone like I love Nate. He will forever have a place in my heart, but no longer a place in my life. I love him, but I've got to stop this before I go insane. So I'm done. I don't know what's gonna happen if/when he calls or I hear from him again. It's gonna be hard. Do I answer the phone/email? Do I just ignore the phone/email? What the hell do I do? I guess that is a question that I dont' have an answer to and won't until/if he calls/emails again.

OK -- On to bigger & better things!!! Well, better anyway, I don't think you can get much bigger than 6'5" 285 lbs., but I'll sure try! Can you believe Kody turns 6 on Saturday?? I can't. It seems like only yesterday that he was just born. Where have all the years gone? That means next year, I will be 30! Yikes! Kyia leaves on Wednesday for Colorado. I'm not gonna see her until Saturday the 14th! That's a long time to be away from her mama! :( I will miss my Kiki LaRue! :) Took the kids swimming yesterday at G'ma's & Kyia insisted on dunking her head in the water! I just sat there & laughed at her. 2 years old & she's dunking her head. Every time she would dunk her head, she would run over to me & wipe off her face. It was very cute! She had lots of fun tho. And that is what counts! I will be taking the boys to see Thunderbirds this weekend. Kamron is coming down and I'm gonna take them to see the movie for Kody's birthday. They both want to see it, so it will be fun for them. Then, I guess I will be taking them to see the new Yu-gi-oh movie. It comes out on the 13th of August. They both want to go see it. So, it's off to Thunderbirds & Yu-gi-oh. :)
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